★ simply in love with you ★

2012-01-26T16:57:00.002+08:00

GONG XI FA CAI !!!!
Officially dragon year. As usual, same as last year.

I don't know is it the hatred, or cant be bothered mood in me.
Trying my very best not to think negative, or maybe i used to what it is.
Oh, did I say I 'fall down' again.
YES, once again, even in the 2012. That why i say im just so fuck up.

Running and keep on running !!!

2012-01-08T23:03:00.002+08:00

Finally finally finally
Closed chapter for the awful 2011 I had. *phew*

Welcoming beautiful 2012, and is also my year-DRAGON !!!!
*please don't be so awful like last year*
Same as usual, set my new goals and resolutions, hoping to achieve.
I will promise myself to become a better, responsible and be more feminine for the year. Hahaha.

The first 8 days of the year was kind of messy and complicated already. How can i be so confuse and not even be myself for the first 8 days.
But I do enjoyed some lil moments. I felt so contradicting now.

Whatever it is, definitely want to be a better person.
Time to bed now. Complexion seems so bad, didn't have enough sleep on the first day of this year already.

Tomorrow A shift. really fuck my life.

Last but not least, good night to you.

2011-11-11T16:40:00.004+08:00

I will never never never be happy :(

I really don't know what to do. :(
Just continue do that to me.
Keep on torture my mind.
Because u never see me happy again.

2011-10-29T13:04:00.003+08:00

went for a haircut 3 days ago. im loving the length of my hair.
Thanks Sam.

November bad month.
pay cut for don't know whatever reason. sucks.
wait for the pay slip .
The schedule still alright. Many late shifts.
Dont know is it good or bad.

Irritating people still irritating.
They are born with it.
What to do.

Really have to know what i want and should really pen down some planning and do some savings.

My driving license. please wait for me.
i will come get you ASDAP!!!

=(

2011-10-20T00:24:00.002+08:00

2 months plus since my last update.
many things happened and definitely happened for reasons.
dont bother to say.

In love with myself. No more drama. ENOUGH.

My life still the same, things happened/repeated everyday. nothing new at the moment.
By the way can time rewind back, to the day i wish and watch it like a movie.

i know is impossible.
=(

2011-08-23T10:34:00.002+08:00

witch,
fuck off

2011-08-23T09:52:00.003+08:00

Hey WITCH,

-whose blog is this?
-why cant i post randomly stuffs?

whatever it is. WITCH is stalking me. I cant say anything.

I jumping off the building once again. Hey WITCH, u are still the same.
Things still the same.

Blame myself to fall into this kind of fucking trap.

BLAME MYSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!

=( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =( =(

2011-08-23T01:20:00.002+08:00

How to break curse from the WITCH?
Im clueless.

It seems like im stuck in the curse that the WITCH cast on me and i cant help myself to get out of it.

I wanna get out.
I wanna get out.
I wanna get out.
I really wanna get ooouuuutttt.

Why am i so foolish to believe whatever the WITCH say or should i say im just dumb and get myself into deep shit of troubles.

I dont want harm the innocent people.

where are you =( =( =(

2011-08-07T05:28:00.001+08:00

2011-07-06T16:46:00.003+08:00

Almost forgotten my blog address.

Been so long since my last update.
Feeling wasnt great sometimes and depressing mood to come back to me as and when it happy.

I dont felt anything, special that i should experience.
Maybe is a karma.
I always want to be someone. i know is impossible .
I want to be like them in everything. But what can i do is to improve myself, my current situation.

Tomorrow is my BTT test. Hopefully i pass.

*praying hard*

Dont know why, maybe my low esteem is damn low. or should say is actually low.

2011-06-19T04:48:00.001+08:00

Am I happy?
Why am I depressing these past few days.
was miserable
my low self esteem is killing me again .

will you understand.

=( =( =( =( =(

2011-06-11T11:26:00.002+08:00

I THINK the spec i'm wearing is super cool yeah. pink colour framing things !!!
And is cost $15 bucks ya. haha..

2011-06-11T11:08:00.005+08:00

Is already June and what did I do or achieve these few months?
Is it too serious!!?? haha..

I wanted to buy lot of stuffs, recently. My urge is calling me out to get these done but without enough cash on me. Damn sickening !! @_@

Laptop, camera, facial, mani and pedi, new bags, new clothes, new shoes.
ARRRGGGGHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Enough of this, I been hurting myself recently, very bad. Even my colleagues were shocked about the bruises. Left leg was last 2 weeks injury and now right leg.

Been so clumsy and should start taking calcium for my bone. Blue black was so bad. It not just happened on my knee but other part of me too. is over .

Anyway school is damn boring with the projects and executive report. OMG!!! I don't even know what exactly are that and can I imagine if I become manager in future doing all those stuffs, like writing reports, meetings, briefing, talks. CANT IMAGINE !!!!!
Geraldine had left us for the career that she want all along, guess so. feel so happy for her and definitely she will excel in her job ;)

BTW did I mention my birthday celebration last month. Was a last minute chalet and everyone came down blah blah blah.
really appreciated what they all have done for me. not to mention but I feel u all in my heart. really touchie =)

Last but least to end this my supa long post , damn it, IS GONNA RAIN !!!!!
what the hell is this.

2011-05-12T11:07:00.000+08:00

I made my very voting on the polling day .
Was wondering why so many younger generations like those born in 80s are really so interested in the election? Guess they see how their fathers work very hard for the family? or how the government trying to build a better home or the living standard in Singapore goes higher ?
Whatever it is, over and see what the PAP and WP can do for us;

Oh ya, I fell down on the damn important day - Polling Day .
Fucking embarrassed. Like my colleague said; I didn't lose anything but my pride. Shop was crowded, queue was forming outside, and I fell. Is fucking shit and got myself a bruise. Is a huge swollen . ARGH!!!

that the bruise I got myself on polling day at work ~

and i got myself some injuries as well. ~ damn clumsy of me.

hopefully everything fine ~

2011-05-05T00:24:00.001+08:00

so into the AMERICAN NEXT TOP MODELS ..
watching cycle 16 now.

Inspire by them and wish to be like them.
sound so bimbo.

nite and miss you

2011-05-04T00:49:00.000+08:00

fuck it

2011-05-03T23:57:00.000+08:00

lil bull miss you
-_-

2011-04-03T12:01:00.003+08:00

OKok..
FINALLY i worked in the shop, wearing their uniform, their shinning name taq with the logo !! and get to feel all the bags and wallets without buying it.
OMG!!!!!!!!! is so good, isnt it.

sometimes, i felt im still in my dream. because i cant believe i'm in the store, behind the bag bar. oh my !!!

Standing the whole day with a small kitten heel really killing me yesterday. My feet hurts, my toes hurts.
cant wait to have their shoes. Is a ballerina shoes. I should have bought it. hAA..

oKOK. I WILL LOVE MY NEW JOB !!!!

2011-04-01T00:37:00.002+08:00

Officially last day of work at Quintessential. ;(
But was damn unlucky for me lo. Is really damn fucking shit.

You know what anot.
Money was missing from petty cash and is 100 bucks . damn IMPOSSIBLE .
I'm the one handle money in petty cash and everything was recorded, suddenly when i pay for the the magazine and AH HA, 100 bucks was missing from the pouch.
I was like, 'WTF is this' played me when I going to leave.
Nvm, I paid and left a note to say anyone forget to record, please return me the 100 bucks.

And another interesting thing happened just as 1 more hour before i finish work.
I BROKE THE GLASS CABINET. I WAS LIKE AGAIN WTF IS THIS MAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Is damn fucking SUAY lo.
And I have to go pick up the glass personally at AMK after my training and rush back to Pacific Plaza to fix it, because i felt bad .

I was thinking what wrong with it man.
ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
By the way, is over and move on .
=(

A new month and hopefully better luck at my new work place =)
Oh ya,
HAPPY APRIL FOOL !!!!!!!!!!!

Time to bed , gonna wake up early tmr =)
wish me luck

see ya ~

2011-03-23T01:43:00.003+08:00

*balck and white of me *

it's so late now and i just bath because i dye my hair to dark drown. Damn silly lo. Waiting for my hair to dry.

8 more days to end of the month. Spent 1/4 of my life.
What did I do man?

*change new job on the 1st April* What the hell.
I will say a major change. I'll miss Quintessential, miss the nice customers, miss the working hours, *evil laugh* and last but not least my 3 great bosses. They are nice people and someone I can learnt from.
I know they will wish me all the best in future =)

Darling went to Phuket. Enjoying life and I'm struggle with my LGA 2 of Managing Service Operation. It sucks.
Happy for her, happily with his boy boy, hakim yeah !!!

picture of her and her boy - The Hoodies Couple.
haha.

Whatever it is, i really happy for her, from my bottom of my heart =)

miss you as much as i know

2011-01-25T00:26:00.002+08:00

hmmm
why why why.

anyway anyway anyway

FUCK MY LIFE!!!

2011-01-12T01:05:00.001+08:00

change the picture and song.

a new change of my blog in 2011

2011-01-12T00:39:00.003+08:00

OMG !!! is 2011..

I just feel WTF is this.

I still im a lost bull and dont know heading to where .. =(
That kinda sad, you see.

i want stay in your hug, feel your love.

2011-01-04T00:04:00.001+08:00

she my best darling. =)

so many things happened, pardon me for being like that.
hope you understand yeah ..

miss you babe =)

2011-01-03T23:55:00.002+08:00

5 more mins to the 4th days of the Jan .. Time really just flies by like that.

many things happened last year, and I really being such a failure, always.
I really don't know what goes wrong and people normally will blame the year is bad or blah blah blah. But in my situation, who should I blame.

The person is me.

I created such a big mess and I really don't know how to clear the shit. I told that i will clear the shit but I didn't make it because I just don't know or whatever the reasons are, is all me. ;(
I still stubborn as usual.

I always live in my own world, my world where people dont really care about each other feeling - called 'selfish world of mine'.

is just so fuck up.

my world is black and white =(

2011

2011-01-01T21:19:00.001+08:00

Today is the first day of 2011..
Was very happy when my darling invited me to her friends' party at one of the hotel somewhere near town. They are a group of fun and friendly people :))) really enjoy myself with them and taking pictures. They even came up with a theme - RETRO .. Is like oh mine, hahaha

till .......

Don't wish to say much though. Is really Fml to the extend that I guess not everyone can take it yeah . 

Bit whatever it is, just moved on.

Went to the 四马路 pray pray :)) And I'm alone lo.. Lame lame :))
Just hope everything will be better and better this year :))

2010-12-12T18:01:00.005+08:00

Yesterday was having dinner with Weiliang, my old friend :))
Nice catching up with him as we soo long never meet up or chat ..
Hope he will be happy and quickly find a gf .. haha.. will definitely intro him a girl if I know someone is suitable for him ;))

I just really don't like this year.

I HATE 2010, especially me ;((

lil bull :((

:(

2010-11-30T12:10:00.001+08:00

Not a good months recently to me, should say not a good year though.

Im destroyer whom destroy ppl life. I guess I have the ability to drive ppl into corner without realizing or unintentional doing it 

Is really hurtful by doing it.
My heart aches :((

2010-11-16T02:55:00.002+08:00

heading to bed soon.

yeah, my dashboard is back to old setting.
HATE THE NEW setting. IT SUCKS.

good night ; miss you ^^

anyway cut new hairstyle and dye new colour, like a month ago!!

2010-10-29T23:40:00.000+08:00

I feel that if I never scolded or say by someone, it doesn't make my day like a day.

FUCK,
used to it.

I'm just dumb, insensitive, stupid, lonely person.
I'm also PCB, KNN, whatever you can think of.

fuck care me.
let me rot and decay and slowly disappear .

FML
=( =( =( =( =( =(

2010-10-08T12:27:00.000+08:00

I feel so weird and really damn uncomfortable.

Feet everything are just not right, I don't blame the surrounding, but myself for cant adapt to this weird world. I thought I can adapt every places and surroundings easily, inner feel is the most difficult. At times, I feel hard to breath, a kind of feeling is so unbearable, something torture within you and heart.

I may sound stupid, but who cares. They are not me, they will never know how i feel inside me.

I have damn low self- esteem.
I may look strong outside and independent, still hope someone will pick me up and make me feel not the way I want.

like same old saying ; you will never know how i feel because you are not in my shoes.

DAMN FML !!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-10-01T00:48:00.000+08:00

Is 1st October 2010.

Time files very damn fast.

I miss you /:
Do you feel the same as me?

Hais.

I just a stubborn lil bull =/

2010-09-30T02:18:00.000+08:00

not on my twitter anymore /:

1 more day to October.
Days and months passed and is not within my control anymore.

fuck it.
hate all things happened.

ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!

lil bull miss smell and hug.

2010-09-21T00:09:00.002+08:00

i am a monster.
AAAAAARRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FML.......

i want to feel safe in your hug.
feeling so damn scared, really terrified.

what should i do?
really so so so damn damn terrified.

the feeling that i dont like is back to me again.
hate this terrified feeling.

Ne-Yo - Beautiful Monster

2010-09-21T00:07:00.000+08:00

Barry Manilow-Can't smile without you (lyrics)

2010-09-20T23:52:00.000+08:00

2010-09-16T02:44:00.002+08:00

posted lot of songs.

miss you miss you miss you

劉力揚-禮物 KTV

2010-09-16T02:31:00.000+08:00

1208-Xia Yi Ge Tian Liang

2010-09-16T02:27:00.000+08:00

雪中花

2010-09-16T02:09:00.000+08:00

情难忘

2010-09-16T02:05:00.000+08:00

情孤單．愛認命

2010-09-16T01:51:00.000+08:00

2010-09-16T01:39:00.002+08:00

Do you miss me when i not around with you, like now?

i really miss you alot =(

2010-09-06T23:38:00.000+08:00

The Hour Before Dawn Is Always The Darkest -

Agree?

hais. lil bull is feeling lil bit unwell.

How about ...

Is already September and ...

2010-08-26T01:15:00.000+08:00

25th August 2010;

猜不透 myself at all.
I cried badly on the day, i promised myself not to cry anymore.

坏人 - YAP MEI YAN
I always remember the scenery.
Feeling was hurt, pain.
I brought this upon me.

FUCK MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Can someone stab me with a knife?
please !!!

2010-08-05T23:38:00.001+08:00

I HATE HUMANS

Especially me ;
So, can someone come straight to my face and stab me to death, i will really appreciate what you have do to me =)

Thank You

2010-08-02T01:22:00.000+08:00

This is probably my life =(

Sometimes, I feel so tired everything about me.

If One Day, You find your happiness, I will wish you all the best.
I will only blame myself.
I just an insensitive girl without knowing.

I am stubborn lil bull =)

Can god take me away ?

2010-07-27T00:04:00.000+08:00

Why is not raining tonight?
Why is not 3am?

Why am i doing here? I shouldnt be here.

Should be in heaven .

2010-07-24T02:28:00.004+08:00

2010-07-23T13:16:00.002+08:00

Yesterday feeling not good at all =( have the urge of crying.

Been thinking all these year as when I grow up, WHAT DO I WANT EXACTLY.
Asking this question lot of times and seriously I cant find the answer.

Promise myself will become into better person (after listening to darling xueli's karma story, which i also believe) and prepare myself for the day.
You are always in my mind ever since the day.
I'm stubborn lil bull :)

Been searching for a nice bag high and low. =(
Plus bad hair day EVERYDAY especially my fringe.
Don't know want to keep it longer or cut it short again.
Thinking of keep it long and see what it turn out to be. ha-ha.

Anyway FINALLY went to Double 0 Wednesday with darling xueli and lovely janice =)
Since is a ladies night, I mean go have a look. I will say I prefer old one, as more crowded and bigger space. Their music don't really suit me =( all along I love double O, don't know why.

Weekend again -_-

One more week to PAY DAY :)

i miss you so much.

2010-07-20T00:48:00.002+08:00

It been awhile since i post anything over here.
Many things happened and i don't know where to start or i don't wish to say .

I am very insensitive toward people's feeling, because i can simply treat nothing happen and tmr will be a better day.
Isn't make life more easier and happier.
I don't mind being sad alone, or unhappy.
Is ok. I'm fine with it. That why some people may think i very unfriendly.

I think alot tonight. I really don't know what I want .
I just feel I'm so fucking useless. and i don't have the right to say or ask people to change.
I am the one who need a change in my attitude and character.
But that me, i really trying hard to change and open up. But that me, how.

I really trying hard. Regardless in my life, my work or anything that me involving.

Can i just die like that tmr.

2010-07-01T23:36:00.002+08:00

Betrayal, lies, hatred, love, jealousy and more.
WTF is all this.

Fairy-tales are all faked, gladly accept that -_-
sound so sucks.

Why do things turn out to be like that.

There is saying which i posted on Fb recently ;
"God is like customer service of life"
But do they really know how to help us.

STAY AWAY FROM ME, I'M DEVIL.

Everything is really killing me. I feel so terrible and terrible.
Can i just die like that. Please grant my wish.
Living in this world is so miserable.

Love me for who i am.
Hate me for who i am, too.
Is so tired to be a human being, especially when a human being keep making mistakes.

Stupid, yeah, that me.

FUCK IT.

Let pray hard, i just die like that tomorrow =)

i so miss you.

2010-06-28T01:09:00.002+08:00

i never update my blog for so long.

Lot of things happen =(

CONFESSION PERIOD ; (what the heck)

I'm single =)

need to work hard for my goals.

=( =( =(

Whatever it is, my darling Xueli is back to Singapore. Hope she enjoy herself. Lots of things need to update her.

Why is so hard to find a part timer??? So sucks.

Fuck it la.

i miss you =(

2010-06-12T01:02:00.002+08:00

Ole ole ole !!!!!!!!!!!
This what people are waiting for every 4 years. OMG!!!
I can feel the fever, feel the excitement going on.

I love Shakira- This time for Africa song. She so gorgeous.
She is the best person sing this song.
Whatever it is. I cant wait to see England vs USA match. Definitely Rooney is playing man.
CANT WAIT !!!!

Had exam today. SUCKS.

Took bus home, sitting double deck bus and you know what ; the bus driver didn't switch on the light for the upper deck. I was like, hmmm.. is cool isn't it.
Light didn't switch on from TPY to one stop before I alight.
Enjoying the darkness and glad that not much people board the bus.
So was like silent and darkness till I 1 stop before alighting.
*Telling me I should get off the bus*

I'm so depress again. FUCK IT!!!

miss you

2010-06-11T00:05:00.002+08:00

FUCK!!!!
Never have this kind of fucking feeling for so long. It just come to me like ta-da.
Depress , sad

I don't know what going through my mind.

KILL ME PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i'm so miss you, how i wish you are here now, to hug me.
=(

2010-06-10T01:31:00.000+08:00

I believe that ignorance is the root of all evil. And that no one knows the truth.

Hypocrisy, the lie, is the true sister of evil, intolerance, and cruelty.

2010-06-07T22:32:00.001+08:00

2010-06-07T01:48:00.002+08:00

Again, nothing to upload like pictures.
Realising I don't look good in picture, in another word, NOT PHOTOGENIC.
I damn damn damn look so ugly in portrait style.

But i uploaded quite a few songs to FB. Obviously songs I like. LAME SHIT>>
Feel so tired of updating Facebook.

Doing all the same things, every single day. WTF!!!
I need COLOURS or EXCITEMENT in life.

Tired of talking or should say tired of thinking and typing at the same time.
Is just seriously shit BORING and TIRED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I want a small gateway trip to anywhere that is not so tiring. -_-
Envy darling xueli going to Cameron Highlands in 2 weeks times. Who ask me not making passport, like ILLEGAL IMMIGRANT.

Enough of all the shits. go to bed now.

officially missing you

2010-06-03T00:15:00.002+08:00

Like the picture shown ; I;m just too tired.
Feel like want to leave everything behind and go for a holiday. WTF!!!!!!

Is June, and I not yet taking my private basic theory. NO SLOTS!!!
WTH!!! No slots for the entire month for private candidates. Is so damn ridiculous la.
Priority goes to the school. Shit them.

Feel like taking bike lesson too. Is like so cool and easy to support also.
Decision decision when I have times la..

Meeting my darling xueli tmr after so long, like since 15 may. haha.
Like hanging out. haha.

guess have to sleep now. Time to bed, peeps.

i just so miss you

2010-05-31T22:42:00.002+08:00

I miss you CHEN XUELI.

Miss hanging out with you ;
Miss your jokes ;
Miss the supper ;

Dream of you last night. It is so vivid.
Guess i miss you so much .

Tomorrow is !st June. WTF.
What did i do in these 6 months?

Going to bed now, tired.

miss you =)

2010-05-28T00:43:00.002+08:00

Something which i don't understand at all.
It happen so sudden and i really have no idea what happen or what to say.

Did the person really show some empathy on me?
Did the person know how i feel?
Is bother me so much till i almost cant breath.

I will always remember and never blame whoever is the person.
I just take it .

FUCK, is still bother me why the person do that.

i really mean it, i miss you.

2010-05-20T00:06:00.002+08:00

I feeling depressed depressed depressed, once again =(

I want your hug;
I want your love;
I want your kiss;
I want your accompany;

But it seems so far from me. WHY???

WTF, i dont know what to write.

so miss you;

2010-05-17T23:50:00.002+08:00

Tomorrow is my first day of school.
Feeling so excited; been saying out my feeling about the excitement umpteen times.
I don't give a damn la.

Gonna work very very very hard for my future, and feel that my schedule is so pack with work and study soon.
Praying praying very very very hard nothing gonna goes wrong for school and work if not i can bang wall and died.

Sleeping early soon, feel so tired last few weeks,
Oops, did i mention that on my last post? i guess i did. FUCK

Plan plan plan, i really need to do my planning now. I mean NOW!!!!!

miss you as much as you miss me.

2010-05-17T01:02:00.002+08:00

Well, just celebrated my 22nd birthday.
WTH.
Aging?

Thanks for all the messages from friends and loves. Appreciated.
Will be very busy and tired from tmr onward, i guess.

School going to start this weekend.
No off day for me till i really find a part timer to help out.
I cant imagine how tired i am going be, not too bad.
Just get home immediately after work and school, don't anyhow run.
Working and schooling can be very tiring, but the other side of me make me feel so excited going back.
Just contradicting, as usual.

Time to sleep, mask session. Really not enough sleep last 2 weeks. =(

missing you now.

2010-05-08T01:27:00.003+08:00

I feel that i will have a tiring month -_-

Really need plenty of beauty sleep and lots of mask session.

Feel so damn tire of my own life suddenly.
Guess i'm tire. =(

2010-05-07T01:27:00.001+08:00

2010-05-07T01:13:00.002+08:00

Omg, i felt like i'm so mean!!! To do something i shouldnt do.
I was just merely trying and it get in.

Hope everyone, apply to those whom i lost contact with are getting well and doing good.
kind of randomly.

I went down to pay my school fees today =).
Starting school in 2 weeks time and feeling excited about it. Hopefully nothing goes wrong and successfully getting my diploma cert in a year time.

No time to collect my DS. Send for repair cause of dont know what error. WTF.
I miss my favourite YONG TAU HOON. My last meal of YONG TAU HOON was end of April.
Will go eat again when i getting back ds probably next week =)
Shall make myself fix one date to go down collect my ds and have my yong tau hoon, maybe after my work next Monday or Tuesday, if not my ds will be forever there sia.
Taking a direct bus to there is much more easier than taking MRT from my work place.

Been going out with my darling and weijie last 2 days. And FINALLY they came down to 85 market for supper. Been sort of "begging" them sia. WTF!!
Taking pictures and talk about lots of stuffs.
I'm really glad that our friendship is still very strong.

Uploading pictures we took in my next post =)

i missing you right now

2010-04-30T00:30:00.002+08:00

I don't know what to blog about .

I guess i really need to take break and go for a short trip to anywhere. I been thinking of going away ALONE !!! sound fun =)
You will never know you will you meet, what happen during the trip and what interesting things may happen.

I'm starting school next month. Hopefully everything go smooth for me.

Do you miss me when i not with you?

2010-04-19T00:26:00.004+08:00

Suddenly at this hour, I'm thinking what the fuck is going on man.
Nothing happen to me, just out of sudden, emotion step in. FUCK!!!

Attend a wake at my old work place. Grandpa passed away. No pain and just left =(
That life man, always never know what will happen next.

Sometimes,
I wish i can leave this world, free from pressure, free from worry, free from troubles.

Just so afraid of my future.
Feel the time is running out and i really afraid of making wrong decisions. I;m just so afraid.
Is making me so suffocate about the future.

I feel like dying man. =( =( =(

What if,
I leave this world so suddenly, what will happen?

I;m thinking of you now.

2010-04-11T22:48:00.002+08:00

The weather is fucking hot.

Is only April 11 and my money is like fucking low and i dont know why. WTF!!!
Is damn damn angry lo..

From now on, i should restrict myself spending $50 every week, if not gonna die soon.
How to go sale next month =(

Should i blame myself for spending too much or should i blame that my pay is low?

Really should start to plan =)

2010-04-10T00:30:00.002+08:00

Cut my fringe -_- turned out to be not the style i want.
WTF...

Feel so down now. don't know why. Simply love friends and loves.
Especially love my darling xueli.

Lots of white hairs keep growing out from my head and i guess is time for to me dye hair.
=( not good not good..

Off to bed now, tire plus running nose =( feeling terrible.

Last but not least ;
i just miss you alot =)

2010-03-27T02:07:00.002+08:00

Never update this blog so long =)
well, i guess i've moved on and enjoy every single of my days .

i'm blessed with friends and loves =)

2010-02-15T22:51:00.004+08:00

Well, what can i say..
First and second days of CNY is officially over for me. Start to get ready and work hard for the year. Frankly speaking, i wasted 1 and half months, saying i will do that, i will do these and lots of things, but did i really plan or mange my times well?

NOPE, i didnt at all..

I cant waste my times just like that doing nth anymore.

Celebrated baby birthday at Hotel Re! ... I would say is a nice and simple ambient. A cozy hotel far away from the city. The bed is so comfortable even baby want to buy the bed home. Haha.
A hotel with small restaurant, cozy wine lounge and small massage and manicure and pedicure center.. Defienitly will go back again =)

Celebrated CNY and Valentine's Day together this year. I guess is a good thing because is save money. Haha.. Spending money and receiving money at the same time. Haha..

Thanks baby for the Valentine's present. Love you =)

K la, guess enough already . Should go rest and prepare myself and have a good start TOMORROW!!!

2010-01-31T05:07:00.004+08:00

Chilling with friends at town. Wanted to shop for my new year clothes but didnt manage to do that. =(
Had so called dinner at Billy Bombers. Guess it will be my first time and my last time to patron. I dont know what to eat or should say i not a beef/steak person. Foods over there are mostly steaks or ribs, but i just love the old American atmosphere.

Share this jumbo hotdog with Janice, is not really JUMBO, is "THICK". haha..
Wanted to go over KPO beside Killiney Singpost, opp the new shopping mall which happen to forget. LOLS!! Love the outdoor style but they told us "it meant for those REGULAR customers" and we were like WTF!!!!!! isnt sarcastic?

So we went to Giraffe. I know this place long ago, i didn't know the price over there is so good and bottles wines are so REASONABLE. Atmosphere definitely better than KPO.
I will go back there again to hang out with friends, definitely.

Back to my bf house to give him a surprise =) now waiting for him =(

2010-01-24T04:56:00.002+08:00

Randomly updated this photo. Took this photo long time ago, when i used to Eclipse in my bag.
Guess what i use this empty box when i finished my mints?

Drum Roll ~~~~

I used it as my bobby pins, clips and rubber bands stuffs.. Hey, is a very useful innovative idea.
Omg, i'm praising myself~~

2010-01-24T04:04:00.002+08:00

It been soooo long since I'm updated my dead blog.
Recently very active in facebook especially using my phone to facebook.
Spent enjoyable new year eve at st james with baby and friends. Photos uploaded at facebook cos i a lazy bum to save in photo-bucket.
*shit* Suddenly remember i could upload photo through save files in my desktop. Guess really have to buy a thumb-drive, at least i could save all the pictures there. Should start creating folders to store the pictures. It seem so messy ..

Really have to start planning what should i do this year, just don't want waste so much times doing useless stuffs.

HAVE TO START FULFILL MY RESOLUTIONS !!!

I guess i should start doing my stuffs and get on to the right track.
No more wasting times!!!

2010-01-09T00:32:00.002+08:00

fuck ; i never update and my blog start to rot .. haha..
i'm just soooooooooooooooooo fuking LAZY and TIRED, back to square, who will read it.???
Enough of emo stuffs.

Is a new year and new start.
I got so many things haven do it and i must get back to right track ASAP so that the diary i bought is not wasted. *rolling eyes*
I also have so many things haven buy, argh.. not enough money.

No mood to blog.

2009-12-13T13:12:00.002+08:00

; jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way ;

Christmas is coming!!! I love this special occasion, guess everyone loves this festival too =)

Anyway it been such a while since i updated my dead and boring blog, who cares!! i;m so emo, always.
Last night was ZoukOut event, seriously i didn't participate any this kind of outdoor event in my whole life. I'm way too shy and don't have friends who love party events except clubbing -_-

anyway i just feel that i'm JINX!!
stay away from me

love my baby too ;

2009-11-22T03:14:00.004+08:00

Yeah, today decorated the Christmas tree with my boss =)
The theme colour for this year is gold and silver balls and the "scarf" things. I find it gold and silver colour combination is nice =) So ladies, try this 2 colours for this year party.

I'm so excited and really looking forward for this festival. Haha..

Really think alot for my next year plan and i really wish i can fulfill everything for what i plan ..

Anyway ladies, do visit Quintessential for gifts, clutches and jeweleries, ok.

House of Harlow by Nicole Richie is finally here, waited for their 2nd batch of back order for sooooo long !!! I'm so in lovvvveee in her collection especially necklace and sunburst ring ..
Okokok, the ring is huge and i know .. haha, but i love it =)

Kidada Disney Couture is good for gifts and for ourselves too ^^
Enough of the "rubbish", do visit www. quintessential.com.sg for more updates ..

2009-11-19T22:19:00.003+08:00

Argh!!!
Raining this few weeks, should say it rain almost everyday -_-
Obviously i buy an umbrella just for today. haha...

bought this umbrella at watson @ 6.95... haha.. is checkered style.

just hope it dont rain when i want to go out =) hahah!!!

2009-11-11T00:05:00.001+08:00

is nice =)

Anyway they are cute =)

2009-11-09T04:43:00.003+08:00

Is November now and i realized how times files.. Still thinking back on Jan, still planning my new year resolutions and now Christmas is coming.
Met up with my loving darling, xueli. So miss her and went shop around. Is a must we should meet up often, so we wont give each other a chance to miss =)

Been thinking about my prospect recently and discussed with baby, he right, CPF is important if not i will die terrible in future when i want to buy a flat. I just cant bear what am i doing. I bad at making decision especially when i stay a place with good peoples. What should i do? Continue or not. I need to think for future too. CONFUSE!!! I should hang on till christmas and see how the economics go.
Right now, no upgrading at the moment even though how i wish i can.

Enough of those, got back my N76 after deciding to repair this phone. Happy because i can upload pictures and stuffs.

Christmas is the best festival in the calender follow by Chines New Year =)

2009-10-26T00:42:00.002+08:00

DIET !!! DIET !!! DIET!!!
That what i been doing this one week.
I mean not fully on diet. i guess, i hope i will see the effect now.
Watching I Guess show and realized that eating rice almost everyday will actually make me grown fat.
Right now, i'm cutting down on rice, slowly.

Plan to go Night Safari on Halloween with baby, but i choose not.
1) Location is too far.
2) Working that day.

I;m just so lazy!!

Lot of things to plan, don't know where should i start.

2009-10-23T15:46:00.002+08:00

After reading one of the latest joanne's blog entry and i realize what i want is really 1 close friend who i need, bitch around, have fun.

Seriously, i am a independent girl. I dont confide my deepest secrets or whenever i sad to anyone. I just feel that i dont have that kind of friend who can make me tell her my deepest dirty dark secrets. I dont know why. I used to the independent. I keep things at the bottom of my heart.

I really wish time could turn back to the day i'm born.

I used to have a close friend in primary school. Due to my stupid-ness and dumb-ness, i ruined that friendship. I'm sorry =(

Also i used to have another close friend in secondary. We used to hang out together, work together, have fun together, go home together, going over to her house and play or anything. I dont know what go wrong when we're in sec 4. Everything go wrong. I dont know what the hell did i do.
Since that day, we began to drift away from each other. I realized is so terrible. Till now, we dont talked even though we been invited to one of the birthday party.

I dont really even contact mostly secondary school friends any more.
I treasure my ITE school mates now.

I really hope our friendship will last long =)

p/s : kind of emotional =(

2009-10-13T16:15:00.003+08:00

I feel so incomplete.
Whatever i plan and list, i just cant seem to reach my goal at all.
I really following what i planned and in the end, it seem not the way i want.
Say always so easy to understand and happy cos that the way i want it. Whenever i write it down on the note book, is so messy, frustrated, "out of the control" and i have the urge to throw the whole notebook away and get a new want.

Anyway i'm getting a new notebook, again. i changed 3 notebook in a year. OMG!!!
STUPID new year resolution.. ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

WTH it is, over and over again.
So many things i want to buy.
So many things i want to do.
So many things i want to see.

I just feel that i don't have times to do =(

2009-09-22T00:38:00.002+08:00

OH Gosh!!!
my blog is dead >.< who cares.. i just write for the sake of write. who will and read it.

Anyway life is still the same as usual.
Been so tired last few weeks. need some pills to calm me down.
everything are alright and hope will even better.

Watched SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE just now, and realized why this show win so many awards.
It nice..
I still remember i called this movie SLAMDOG MILLIONAIRE. haha..

My mom is super fan of MICHAEL JACKSON. I cant believe she go and buy Michael Jackson: Life Of Legend.

OH NO!!!!!!!!!

2009-09-15T00:35:00.003+08:00

if can, i will go back to the day i born.
i promise i will study hard, work hard, play hard, save hard.
Be more girlie, be smart -_-

i miss my friends
xueli, yvonne, lili, meiling.

2009-09-07T23:23:00.003+08:00

Why do birds suddenly appear
Every time you are near?
Just like me, they long to be
Close to you.

Why do stars fall down from the sky
Every time you walk by?
Just like me, they long to be
Close to you.

On the day that you were born
The angels got together
And decided to create a dream come true
So they sprinkled moon dust in your hair of gold
And starlight in your eyes of blue.

That is why all the girls in town
Follow you all around.
Just like me, they long to be
Close to you.

On the day that you were born
The angels got together
And decided to create a dream come true
So they sprinkled moon dust in your hair of gold
And starlight in your eyes of blue.

That is why all the girls in town
Follow you all around.
Just like me, they long to be
Close to you.
Just like me (Just like me)
They long to be
Close to you.


===================================================================

Watch 還魂 at downtown with baby last week =)
Not too bad, some scenes are just too gross.
Some touching parts almost made me cried, kind of stupid,
especially when this song appeared.

Heard this song from this movie and fall in love with it.
Carpenter's songs are so sweet and nice.
Is go very well with this show.

Anyway i dropped my "scotch- tape" phone in cab.
I remember putting inside my bag and i don't know why it dropped. (heaven will, maybe)
My memory getting bad to worse.
Like i remember i have lock the door, but somehow i think i never lock.
so i cant wait to use N76.. haha.. 

okok, i shall go and enjoy this song.

2009-08-26T23:50:00.001+08:00

suddenly i feel so tire and dont know what to type !!!

I shall sleep early tonight!!!

2009-08-24T08:21:00.003+08:00

i'm so proud to have WATSONS CARD!!!

I wanted to get this card once i know there is such a card exist in this world. I just don't have the "time" to get it, but i went down to WATSONS SALE at expo yesterday and thinking " JUST GET IT FROM HERE" and truth enough i bought it without much consideration.
Anyway don't need to think so much.

I quite disappointed with SALE. Nothing much to buy or see, no wide variety.
I was expecting make-up sales, more choices of shampoos and hair creams and more.
To me, is just like clearing old stocks..

Sometimes is nice to go down this kind of sales as you know, shopping nowdays is like, you really need at least a hundred in your wallet before set foot to malls. Eat, movies, snacks, shopppings.

OH GOSH!! i'm dead broke.

7 days to PAY DAY!!!!!!!!

2009-08-16T19:31:00.002+08:00

went to downtown last night celebrating xueli 21st birthday. i went down after my work and met up with von over there.
we chat, we played cards, we bbq foods, we jokes, we laugh! so enjoying!!!
should come up more of this gathering!

We grown up to big girls, busy with working, busy study. friends getting lesser. That life.
I really treasure my ITE school friends. They are great friends of mine.

And i'm proudly to be TROOOPS member. haha...
www.trooops.com
They are only online shop that i'm really into the membership stuffs and keep coming back to see new items..

suddenly dont know what to say! forget it.

2009-08-14T01:28:00.001+08:00

life as usual =)
nothing to say or dont wish to say? i dont know. but WHO CARE!!!!!!!!

right now, i damn craving lots of money so that i can buy lots of my stuffs at one go !!!

BTW i went to Topshop at Bugis Junction, is having a SALES!!!!!!!
as cheap as 9 bucks!!!
YES. 9 bucks...................................... QUICK QUICK!!!!!!!!!!

Eyeing their blazer! and i seriously i craving for that!!! is cost $149 if i not wrong!!!
really need to CUT BACK to save up money for lots of things.

off to bed, was very tiring for me last few days. really not enough slp.... help!!!

2009-08-04T00:25:00.002+08:00

i'm so into TWITTER nowadays =)

i guess i'm gonna change my blog concept into something else.

let talked about last Friday, met up with my ite school friends.
seriously miss them..
chill-ing at haji lane. went there for the first time. sound kuku>>
hope more chilling session with you guys!!!

craving lot of stuffs and eye-ing more stuffs too, at the same time.
really need a big hairdo soon. is getting bored of my hairstyle.
at the same time wanna keep the length. contradicting?

mom bought a new desktop. hohoho.. is save me from being bring my laptop back and fro.
IS DAMN TIRING!!! the whole desktop look cool =)

got to sleep sound. got to wake up as early as 5am to acc bf to jurong.
Pls bear in mind : i'm a good gf =)

2009-07-21T00:13:00.003+08:00

monday blue..
whatever shit, i dont give a damn.

Anyway there is a report saying we will able to see a
The natural phenomenon - SOLAR ECLIPSE at 08:40:51 AM to 09:43:55 AM Singapore time.
Gosh, i still sleeping...

REPORT:

The dates for eclipses visible in Singapore are as follows:

Solar Eclipses Visible in Singapore between 1999 and 2031

Date	Type	Mid-Eclipse Local Time	Magnitude*
16 Feb 1999	Annular	16h 05m	0.08
26 Jan 2009	Annular	18h 02m	0.85
22 Jul 2009	Total	09h 17m	0.06
15 Jan 2010	Annular	16h 29m	0.31
9 Mar 2016	Total	08h 20m	0.85
26 Dec 2019	Annular	13h 24m	0.97
21 Jun 2010	Annular	15h 58m	0.15
20 Apr 2023	Annular/Total	11h 57m	0.26
22 Jul 2028	Total	09h 41m	0.69
21 May 2031	Annular	16h 59m	0.85

* Magnitude is defined as the fraction of the Sun's diameter covered by the disc of the Moon at middle eclipse as seen in Singapore.

This is what the total solar eclipse will look like. You get to see it in Japan, China, Hong Kong and India.
I serious excited about it, and really able to see even if gonna be partial. ( Better be full, i hope )

Been wondering how the weather gonna be like. I damn excited..
Is the sky gonna be dark? Is the weather gonna be cooling?

No specific place to watch and i guess they will recommend Science Center ba. But Singapore is such a small country, so i guess everywhere will be able to see. Haha.

2009-07-19T05:57:00.000+08:00

working very hard.
striving my best very hard.
loving myself very hard.

what wrong with blgger??? i prefer the original and simple blogger?

am i fussy? I'm not fussy at all.

2009-07-03T01:17:00.004+08:00

I guess i never update for a very long time.
( who cares??!!!)

BAD HAIR DAY ALL THE TIME!!!

Second half of the year. And i realize i didn't mange to fulfill lot of my NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS.
Bad!!!
Economics still falling down and definitely i hope it will become better and better. Of course not the living standard going high up.
Really have to SAVE up for the rainy days, life getting tougher and tougher.
STOP ALL THOSE CRAPS, yup i guess i need to stop thinking negative if not more black hairs have to turn to white hairs. =(

Watch TRANSFORMERS: REVENGE OF THE FALLEN
Everybody so excited and waiting for this show to release and yet it turned out not as good as the first one.
I guess that the bad things about the Part 2.
Sound effect was not that good. All the bad robots were same colours and hard to recognize which one is which one.
I expecting "WOW" all the way while watching it. I had to admit that i impressed with the Egypt and the Pyramid, is so huge. Yup, and guys will be drooling over Megan Fox, even my baby is one of them!!! Oh no.
Rating : 4/5

Waiting for new movies like C.I. JOE and GAMERS to screen. Watch the preview and not that bad with the effects and sounds.
Lot of nice shows coming the second half of the year!! Cant wait =)

H1N1 is still going on in Singapore. Friends, please take good care of yourselves.

Baby was sick last week, having flu and sore throat.
Doctors from CGH didn't really diagnosed baby carefully. Quite unhappy with issues. I mean right now, camps detected H1N1 and should the doctors be more careful when there are NSF regular coming to you, telling you i'm having sore throat and flu?
What wrong?

Enough of crapping. I'm tired and and working tmr @_@
Last but not least, TAN MEILING, I MISS YOU!!!

and i'm quite disappointed in YOU!! ( a friend of mine)

2009-06-26T19:15:00.004+08:00

Michael Jackson at 12

A new really shocking me.

MICHAEL JACKSON IS DEAD

He having Massive Cardiac Arrest. i dont know what that? but i guess is a kind of heart attack.
Can you believe that? i simply cant believe it.

He died at 25th June, 2009 @ 2.26pm at the age of 50.

From the new stated, he had been planning a series of comeback concerts in London, busy rehearsing in Los Angeles area.

I mean i not really a big fan of him, but i guess i must admit his songs are really nice, especially when he do his moon walk dance on stage.

Let hope he rest in peace, born as a white next lifetime.

2009-06-19T01:41:00.000+08:00

What is your True Fear? Your Result: Being Alone While you may act like you don't care on the outside, on the inside your biggest fear is being alone. You can be quite shy and reserved. You feel like a lot of times people don't really see the real you. You're afraid that no one will really truly love you, and that you will be alone for the rest of your life. On the inside you are great person, so just remember that and don't let your shy nature get the best of you! If you don't want to be a lone then you need to make an effort to be with someone. Show the people that you care about that you really love them, and chances are someone will always be there, even if you think they won't.
Commitment
Where Your life is Going
Losing Someone
Death
Disappointment
Looked down on
What is your True Fear? Quiz Created on GoToQuiz

2009-06-19T00:50:00.003+08:00

Tired tired tired. (as usual)

Anyway watched Drag Me To Hell.
Rating 4/5. Kind of story plots you know when it come to ending and the grandma is one of the character making the whole show screaming like hell!!! (I admit i do shout whenever the grandma trying to be scaring)
I must really admired Christine Brown for being brave go to the cemetery alone. I cant do that. It shown us that peoples will do that some kind of brave things when things being uncontrolled or crazy about it.
(you will know what am i talking about if you watch the show)

And yup, met up with primary school friends at Tampines on Sunday.
Great to see them still doing very well =)
Will meet up soon and i promise i will organize the next trip before Huirong and Geraldine school re-open.

Sometimes wish my life will get shorter and don't need to worry so much, think so much ..

( STOP CRAPPING)

but i miss my mom.

2009-06-12T23:55:00.003+08:00

STOP DOING THIS TO ME!!!!!!!!!!

How heart-aching i am now.
Don't worry, audrey may yap mei yan. Everything gonna be alright.

i will be a good girl, i will be a good girl, i will be a good girl.